Sacrifice

Women are literally the most creative beings. 

I’m never going to say that I never want children, but it doesn’t cross my conscious mind too often. Although, I have had nightmares nearly every night for weeks about my baby. I dream that it is quietly in my arms, but unbearably heavy. I always have to put the child down and then I accidentally leave it somewhere. Sometimes I leave it by the beach while I submerge myself in calm blue water. When return, my baby is always gone, as if the tide has swept it away. Most of the time, I don’t remember where I left it. Soon my stomach has ballooned again. I’m pregnant once again. I go the hospital and they tell me I’m not with child. They tell me I’ve never had a child before. What do I carry in my swollen abdomen?

Psychologists and dream interpreters alike have concluded that dreams about pregnancy aren’t literal. The baby can represent a new idea on the horizon. I may be craving time to create or dreaming up a new idea that is developing inside.  

Parents, and women especially, sacrifice everything for their children, even themselves. So what would I give for an idea? What would I create that’s worth sacrificing? What would I destroy? Destruction is creation’s other half. You can’t have life without death, heat without cold, pleasure without suffering.